The Adelaide Ventricle Think Tank - Filled with ideas that just might work! (well some of them): March 2022

Is red wine good for uric acid? Uric acid is produced as a waste product in the human body. A new discovery about a new use for uric acid has alcoholics and heavy red wine drinkers in demand as they can donate excess uric acid like blood donors currently donate blood.

The Winpega Insurance Company has today released a new insurance policy for vulnerable Australians worried about falling under the administration of Public Trustees.​The 'Stay The Heck Away from Me Public Trustee' insurance policy will be provided at a discounted rate at around $1 a day.

The anonymous art vandals group the Vigilante Artists Collective of South Australia (VACOSA) have struck again in Adelaide overnight with the construction of a new statue made from ecologically sound kerbside rubbish. The group says the statue will generate electricity by harnessing EMF electromotive force charges into a Tesla battery and be available for homeless people to charge their phones.

Mullet hairstyles are making a comeback post COVID lockdowns but an urgent plea has gone out from Lawyers And Doctors Without A Mullet (LADWAM) to young lawyers and doctors to NOT become 'mulleted'. Dentists are not affected by the alert. Volunteer groups are being organised to distribute 'demulletfication' information to mullet wearers on the street before the mullet spreads.

Noted Australian Bird Psychologist Dr. Brian Beechworth has translated the birdsong of native Australian birds using The Bird App. Birds locked in aviaries and zoos for years on end are saying they just want out.

An ensemble of more than 20 hardworking truck drivers and their large B Double Trucks will have a special performance of Beethoven's 5th Symphony at the Adelaide Fringe Festival in 2023. The trucks will use their exhaust brakes to perform a work called 'Beethoven's 5th - A Major Cacophony'. Rehearsals are already underway on Portrush Road.

'Gaming Room Open' signs must be removed from Adelaide streets within 7 days after an administrative error found that the 'Gamble Responsibly' warning wasn't properly checked and was actually a paradoxical oxymoron. According to legislation, 'Gaming Room Open' signs without a legally valid warning are not allowed to be displayed until an updated warning is adopted.

Adelaide individual Paul Jackson (He/Him) has taken out the 2022 Archibald Prize with a 3.4 metre portrait of his thumb. The painting entitled 'Man with Thumb' is the first time ever the Packing Room Prize winner has also won the $100,000 Archibald Prize.

Australians unable to cover their nose with a mask now have an answer with Adelaide company 'Nose By Design' manufacturing a mini nose mask to help cover the nose. The new mask works like a nose strip for blackheads and will clean the blackheads off your nose, while covering your nose. "It's win-win", said Nose By Design spokesperson Mr Jackson.