Medical Receptionist Shirley to fill in for God when God has a holiday next month.

Medical receptionist Shirley from the City of Boronia in eastern Melbourne has been approved to fill in for God when God has a holiday next month.

As the principal gatekeepers to doctors, The Medical Receptionist Guild of Australia (MRGoA) have determined that Shirley has the right disposition to deliver judgements on applications usually made to God. This includes petitioners seeking to speak to God.

The MRGoA has approved an application by God for Shirley to sit in God’s chair when God takes leave next month to go to the Easter Carnival at Sandown Racecourse in Melbourne. God fancies ‘Oh My Father’ who is running in Race 8, and wants to see the horse run from trackside instead of looking down from way up in the sky. $50 each way at the moment but if 'Oh My Father' looks good in the ring God might make that a hundy.

Despite medical receptionists not actually being a doctor, or having a doctor's qualifications or years of experience healing people's intimate, personal, private, discreet, complex, multi-layered, historical, emerging and sometimes embarrassing ailments, God felt MRGoA member Shirley would easily rise to the challenge.

“I just reckon Shirley can do it” said God. “Have you ever rung a doctor's surgery and been forced to pass muster by Shirley who, while being an efficient office manager and able to competently run the phone system, is not actually a doctor but has the power to vet your ability to seeing your regular doctor?"

"Now that's power!" said God.

*Shirley has been contacted for comment but The Adelaide Ventricle was still selecting options on the pre-screen phone answering system at Shirley's current surgery when this story went to press. This story is unrelated to the Uber Ambulance solution being rolled out in Adelaide.